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78 definitions by Quacks0

 
1.
TMI
An acronym used as a “time out” or “let’s change the subject” protest on Instant Messenger. Stands for TOO MUCH INFORMATION, indicating that the speaker feels personally violated by his chat buddy’s latest message, probably because it contains details that are either too personal (i.e.: sexual, medically-private, describing one’s deeply-rooted fantasy, etc.) or are of the type that would likely turn one’s stomach, being revolting, gory, or otherwise overly graphic.
Online guy #1: I felt sick yesterday after a “hot’n’heavy” session with my plump new co-worker, so I had to have my stomach pumped, and the contents examined. There were some residues of lipstick, but at least there were no weevils.
Online guy #2: Uhhhhggggghhh… TMI, dude…
додав Quacks0 12 Листопад 2011
16 6
 
2.
To walk and/or act in an openly casual and self-confident (or self-IMPORTANT!) manner, causing irritation and/or resentment in others from your pert attitude; especially when:

(A) your arrival was unannounced/unexpected, and so those present were not prepared to conveniently receive or assist you, or

(B) you lack or did not bestir yourself to obtain the usually-expected experience, paperwork, preparations, credential-references, etc. for your requests to be reasonably fulfilled. or

(C) you have behaved/performed poorly in the past regarding matters similar to what you presently have in mind, and so your would-be providers are none too confident or eager to fulfill your requests.
Bank loan officer (crossly), "You know, you've got SOME NERVE waltzing in here asking for a loan --- three years ago we loaned you a million dollars to look for oil, and you didn't find a drop!"
Oil prospector (casually): "Could have been worse."
Bank loan officer (raising his eyebrows in annoyance): "And then two years ago we loaned you three million dollars to drill for oil, and you came up with nuthin' but dry holes that time, too!"
Oil prospector (shrugging): "Could have been worse."
Bank loan officer (giving a snort under his breath and beginning to twitch angrily): "And then last year we loaned you TEN million dollars to do more prospecting, and you STILL couldn't find any oil!"
Oil prospector (still as sunny and flippant as ever): "Could have been worse."
Bank loan officer (finally blowing his stack): "Why do you keep saying 'it could have been worse'?! We've lost nearly FIFTEEN MILLION DOLLARS through you!"
Oil prospector (smugly): "Could have been my money."
додав Quacks0 2 Жовтень 2011
10 1
 
3.
Hands off the merchandise!

A protest/order uttered by one of either gender when someone else (usually of the opposite gender) wants to indulge in a little touchy-feely, but he’s not in the mood.
Weary girl (pushing her guy's "exploring" hand away from her boobs): Hey! Hands off the merchandise! I wanna go to sleep now!
додав Quacks0 28 Листопад 2011
8 0
 
4.
A man’s penis. Usually referred to this way in a tone of sarcastic disgust, when the speaker (usually female) is mildly-to-moderately irritated.
“Attentive” boyfriend: How did you sleep last night, honey?
Exasperated girl: I didn’t sleep a wink --- how could I sleep with your wienerschnitzel poking at me all night?!
додав Quacks0 25 Вересень 2011
12 6
 
5.
Inflammatory information --- an unwelcome report, letter, set of "facts 'n' figures", etc. --- that its recipients will likely find exceptionally upsetting, frustrating, insulting, controversial, etc.
Senior vice-president: Boy, I'm not looking forward to presenting the board with this quarterly customer-satisfaction report --- it's so full of inflammamation that I seriously doubt if anyone there will be able to keep his cool.
додав Quacks0 7 Грудень 2011
4 0
 
6.
Refers to a situation, cooperative agreement, lucky break, social or intellectual breakthrough, etc. which the speaker finds or considers to be so wonderful, satisfying, relieving, emotionally fulfilling, etc. that it is even better than being merely "sweet". Often said to the provider of the exceptional condition, either to express the speaker's profound joy or to show his unparalleled appreciation for the provider's concerted efforts in accommodating him.
Contractor: Business has been quite slow lately at the heavy-equipment yard, so with a bit of bargaining and negotiating, I was able to get the weekend dozer-rental at a 50% savings, which I'll pass long to you.
Homeowner: Schweet...!
додав Quacks0 5 Грудень 2011
7 3
 
7.
A biased critic's term meaning "Sunshine-State Stupidity", generally used when referring to ballot-card-punching issues, handgun-control, etc.
Y2K Presidential Election --- we put the "duh" in FloriDUH!
додав Quacks0 13 Листопад 2011
5 1