Top Definition

A young male who will give up countless hours of his time listening to the problems of his very attractive female friends because they need someone to talk to about their apathetic, Baywatch jock of a boyfriend because no one else will listen or genuinely care. Although always surrounded by beautiful girls the nice guy can’t get a girlfriend or even facilitate the alleviation of certain “drives” because his “ordinary” physical appearance will forever be compared to the Baywatch beach bum’s. The nice guy would never capitalize on a vulnerable girl, objectify or cheat on a girl, he will go out of his way and bend over backwards to help his “friends” and will never ask for anything in return but no matter how intelligent, understanding, humorous, compassionate, trusting or loyal the nice guy is the female cohort will always pass him up and endure any length of abuse, objectification, apathy and cold-heartedness from a man if he has physical attractiveness, fashion, big muscles and chiseled facial features.

The nice guy will eventually realize that his dependability and empathy will never be appreciated and all his friendships with females are all one-sided. This coupled with years of watching girls go for tanned, muscular jerk-offs with nice cars while he desperately hopes someone will realize that how viable he actually is will spawn and incubate the nice guy’s insecurities and he will eventually abandon his views, dumb-down his speech, take-up weight-lifting and switch majors from cancer research with a minor in theoretical physics to playground management so he can devote his time to emulating Baywatch characters and football players so that he will one day be viewed as more than a “nice guy.”

The nice guy will eventually work up the courage to ask out his attractive female friend but will invariably be turned down because she’s so self-centered that she’d never actually had a smidgeon of compassion for the nice guy’s feelings or even realized that he’s interested in girls. After rejecting the nice guy, the girl will downplay the supposed friendship to the point where they never speak again, which in turn will make the nice guy depressed (ironically, he won’t have anyone to talk to) because he’s devoted so much time and energy and has become so warped from being exposed to these kinds of people that he will either live the rest of his life alone in a tiny apartment, jerking off to old Saved by the Bell episodes or get drunk one night and impregnate a 300-pound, cross-eyed derelict who works at Wendy’s and spend the rest of his life being treated like shit.

The whole ‘nice guy’ phenomenon really supports the idea that people primarily care about physical appearances and that shrewdness, selfishness and narcissism will always triumph over compassion, rapport and “inner beauty.”
"Jeez Patrick, I hope I can find a nice guy like you someday."

"Well, if you need me I'll be at home, crying myself to sleep while masturbating to the sound of my 70-year-old neighbors having sex...I might also play some ps2."
додав desperryado 03 Жовтня 2005
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A badge of martyrdom. Men who spend their most of their time whining about how women “just want to date jerks”. Oblivious to the fact that no one finds people who feel sorry for themselves attractive, much less people who blame others for their lack of success. Most self proclaimed “nice guys” are just as self-centered and misogynistic as the jerks they gripe about, they are just much more spineless. To stupid to figure why women don’t find them attractive, they conclude that in order to get laid they must treat a woman like shit.

They tend to befriend women with the expectation that women owe them something more than friendship, then get all pissed off when the women tells them she’s not interested. Often going after women who are already in relationships, they misrepresent their intentions and try to use emotional manipulation and the facade of friendship as an excuse to get closer to them and score with them.

The sort of man who will give my definition a thumbs down. :)
Nice Guy: Why don’t women date nice guys like me?
Honest Girl: Because, you have no self-esteem and you have to blame other’s for your problems.
додав OneBadAsp 29 Жовтня 2006
A male who can't get a girlfriend, never mind get laid, because he DOESN'T treat women like shit.
Bud is a 21 year old vergin because he's a nice guy.
додав D 16 Лютого 2004
A man who you can call late at night just because you're looking for someone to talk to. He would never speak ill of anyone, never harm a person unless absolutely necessary, never cheat and is always honest. Will help you move just because you're friends and doesn't ask for favors in return. Isn't sleazy and wouldn't take advantage of a person in a drunken or mourning state.

Often times, this nice guy doesn't have a girlfriend because women usually go for jerks and just make friends with the nice guy.
Pity for him, don't you think?
додав kavakale 14 Липня 2004
the person every girl will compare their would-be boyfriends to, for they possess every trait a woman desires. However, for whatever reason, women avoid them like the plague.
"I'd never date Jimmy in a million years, but he sure is a nice guy"
додав ares1013 11 Березня 2005
A man who has rejected the societal notion of masculinity and chosen to define himself from the inside out instead, realising that traits such as empathy and nuturing are not actually limited to the female of the species, and nor are aggression and assertiveness limited to the male.

Despite this newfound revelation, however, there is still a strong genetic predisposition for humans to continuously behave as if we were animals seeking out the alpha male with those genes most suited for surviving in a hostile environment.

Often times, the average woman, whom society encourages to indulge in her weaknesses and surpress her strengths, is a self-loathing masochist who may appreciate the nice guy's friendship and understanding, but feels no attraction toward him because his insecurities remind her of why she hates herself. Therefore, she almost always seeks the dominant, aggressive, unempathic male with whom she can vicariously live to make up for her weaknesses. Of course, this inidividual, commonly known as a jerk, is also usually an egotistical, disloyal, and shallow person for whom societal dictates of masculinity will force him to disregard his mate's feelings and treat her as if she were beneath him.

Feeling emotionally unsatisfied, the female will then turn to her nice guy friend, whom she has long since castrated, for comfort, and complain to him about how men suck, except for him, and that he deserves a good girlfriend eventually except that it is never her or any other woman he might encounter.
I'm a Nice Guy? Fuck You!
додав Killing Kittens 01 Березня 2005
The best kind of guy to date
I dated a nice guy, and it was the best desicision of my life. I'm a woman, and a rather attractive one at that. I used to be the stereotypical cheerleader, you know, with the long blonde hair and more pep than state in space. Anyways, I used to date all the jocks at high school. They were the big manly men, and yes, I had sex with a lot of them. When I was 18, I began strangely feeling slightly disatisfied with my QB BF's. They were the best guys around as my girlfriends would say to me. I had only one male friend who wasn't an athlete I dated or had sex with. I felt like I could tell anything to him. No matter how bad my problems were, he could take them and return a solution to me. Even when grandma died in a car crash, he was there for me. Come to think of it, he really loved me. I feel kinda bad that I didn't realize it at the time. But it doesn't matter now that I'm married to him. He's the kindest, most logical, most loving, best man I could ask for. He said himself that when western civilization comes crashing down, he's going to be holding two things: A gun to protect me in one hand and me in the other. Ladies, if you're reading this, please, for fuck's sakes, actually give nice guy's a fair fighting chance. They won't betray or hurt you. They'll be there for you. They're the most wonderful men ever and I've happy to be married to one.
додав Katy132 27 Серпня 2009
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